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about

written june 2017

lyrics

im not gonna slouch anymore
im not gonna fall on the floor
i wont hold onto yesterday with bright white knuckles
i'll leave my anxiety in the car with my seat buckle
when i go out far
i wont recall when i was subpar

maybe i'll go out to the beach when i get to the coast
maybe i'll go under the pier but probably just eat toast
at home

maybe ill wake up at nine am and drink some water
and be like that
maybe ill go for a walk but most likely just admire something else
from afar like a looking glass or a bell jar
ill write some shit, ill write some more
im gonna try and process and forget it all
ill try to forgive no one but me and myself
who cares if one time i yelled

who cares if one time i tripped and made the wrong face
who cares if one time i was dumb or came to class late
i shouldnt and no one else does
i shouldnt and soon i wont
at least i hope
i hope

eventually i wont be sad over the summer
eventually i wont be such a goddamn bummer
maybe ill find some friends
maybe ill tie some loose ends
turn over a new leaf
die in my bed sheets

who cares if yesterday was subpar
today i will go out far
to the grocery store

credits

from it will always be right now, released April 4, 2019

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eden Indianapolis, Indiana

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